I'm really sorry...but I've found someone else

Hey!

How’s it going? I hope your week went well. TGIF amiright?!

Listen, there’s been something I’ve been meaning to say to you for a while now. I guess you’ve noticed that we haven’t really seen much of each other for the last few weeks, eh? I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you or anything, but I just…I just wasn’t sure what I wanted and was too chicken to say anything out loud. Stupid, I know. I’ve never been good with conflict.

It’s just that I don’t think we should see as much of each other anymore. Please don’t get me wrong; I love you. I think you are wonderful and beautiful and you give me so –SO- much pleasure and make things so much softer for me…but you’re just not good for me. You’re a typical bad boy, like biker-dudes fathers warn their daughters about. You’re fun and awesome, but you’re going to end up destroying me one little bit at a time.

If I could, I’d take you every day. I’d run my hands over your cool body every morning and watch you pour your white goodness into my hot brew. I’d let you fill my cup with your sallow sweetness and wouldn’t even mind if you were full-fat, all the while anticipating the twirls and swirls you perform so elegantly. My mouth would water just thinking about your sweet-savoury wetness.

But I can’t. I won’t. You’re bad news and, as much as it pains me to say so, I have to stop using you for my own gain. I adore you, but I just can’t do this anymore. And, truth be told, I’ve found someone to replace you with. Someone lighter and better for me. Someone who suits me just fine, even though he’s nowhere as full and delicious as you are. I’m sorry, I really am…but I need to look out for myself from now on.

I really hope we can still be friends. And I’m sure that once in a while I’d be up for a little ‘reunion’ if you would. I know I’ll never be able to fully replace you and I’ll always miss you and my mornings really won't be the same. I’ve just really gotta stop this before it kills me.

Thanks for your understanding,
Jenny